On the Road to 60

Halloween season was upon us and we should celebrate right? We’re too old to go trick or treating, and our kids are too old for us to dress them up in cute character costumes. Instead this year they went out as a group of Chippendale dancers, seriously. I suggested they stick $1 bills in their pants, but was told they are classy dancers and get $20. Okay, enough of that conversation.

Us adults decide it would be funner (not really a word) to go to a Haunted House. Well, you know me and my deals, I find a very inexpensive deal (two for $15) for the Nightwalker Caverns. Lisa-Marie, Valerie, Richard and I decide we should get a good scare one night to set the stage for the Halloween weekend.

We arrive around 9:00 pm which apparently is late for a weeknight, or are us old fogies just early,  as it seemed we were the only ones around. I guess people were inside, as we can hear them screaming — heard but not seen. And it turns out the Haunted House is not in anything resembling a house, but in a mini strip mall kind of place in a skate shop. Well, that’s different.

We check-in, were brought around to the entrance, told the rules and warnings — if you have any physical limitations, pregnant, or intoxicated, you are suggested to turn away now. Interesting. We are asked if we want to go in individually, in small groups of two or altogether…there is no way we are breaking up the group (because we’re a bunch of chickens), we are in this together!

Now, us gals, okay me, hate watching scary gory movies (although I am a big Walking Dead fan now), so why are here? I don’t know. But nevertheless, we are shown the entrance “elevator”, doors closed behind us and here we go. The elevator is dark, shakes and rattles and right when the door going in opens some guy eerily comes out of the corner (kind of like the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland). Here we go…Richard leads us into the abyss, with me holding tightly behind (not tightly holding his behind, that’s later), Lisa-Marie and Valarie with hands on each shoulder of the person in front. We’re on an expedition of sorts.

It is completely dark when you enter. Richard needs to touch along the walls to figure out the direction. I don’t dare touch anything. Soon the fun begins, with people jumping out of corners scaring us…sight-bending strobe lights and loud deafening music…gory deathly scenes…creepy girl with freaky eyes walking past you in a zombie like way…a guy whose neon dotted outfit made him blend into the wall…foggy rooms with cut off body parts…figures trying to reach at you behind black plastic walls…a wobbly floor seemingly falling to unknown depths…and then escape.

Well, that was a scare. I actually did scare more than I expected. I don’t like hidden creatures jumping out at me, so well, yes, I screamed. It was fun and glad we did it. It did seem like it went too quick and would have preferred something that would have lasted longer. Then it was brought up there’s some sort of scary event you can pay for where they kidnap you at an undetermined time and take you hostage and “torture” you for a full day. Apparently there is a long waiting list for this activity, but no, that is not on my list.

Okay, I finally went to an official “haunted house” and next year we will search for something scarier! Because we always seem to have this urge to outdo the past. I think this past year has been pretty awesome, and I would be privileged to continue to live my life this way. Maybe I will.

***

Nightwalker Caverns, 6760 University Ave. #100, San Diego CA 92115, www.nightwalkercaverns.com. General admission $15 each. I couldn’t really take photos as I was clinging to dear life.